Hater Rant

Tell me how you really feel.

Handshake Rape

with one comment

People that know me know i’m not a hugger. I dont like to be touched. I especially loathe physical contact with strangers. Shaking hands is already something i do despite the fact that it practically gives me the cold shakes to have to do it. Social convention and all that.

So i may be overreacting, but it sends me into the 6th circle of panicky anxiety-ridden hell when i’m shaking hands with someone and they hold on to it just to force me to stand there while they say things to me that under the very best circumstances would only elicit an uncomfortable smile. Its so inconsiderate. I hardly know you. If i knew you, we wouldn’t be shaking hands in the first place. A handshake is BY DEFINITION something you do with a recent acquaintance or a stranger. So, stranger, what makes you think it’s okay to stand there in the middle of a crowded room and HOLD MY HAND while you compliment me on my pool skills (which are mediocre at very best) and express how you hope you get to play me again? I get it, you’re flirting. But its like trying to flirt with a cornered animal. The panic in my eyes is REAL. You’re talking, and i’m not hearing any of it. I’m just standing there wondering why i’m holding hands with a stranger and when this nightmare is going to end. I’m plotting my escape. I’m wondering how long before i start to gnaw on my own wrist in an attempt to free myself from your lingering handshake of doom. I’m wondering if violence is an appropriate reaction and how hard i will have to hit you with my free hand to get you to let go. I’m wishing i didn’t leave my rape whistle in my purse across the room.

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Written by haterrant

February 1, 2011 at 12:30 pm

Posted in Common Courtesy

One Response

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  1. It’s your hand; You can take it back whenever you want.

    Carlos

    February 8, 2011 at 1:15 pm


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