Hater Rant

Tell me how you really feel.

Have a seat

with 3 comments

I hate squatters. No wait. Not dirty, train hopping, Anarchist, dumpster diving, smelly, ex-suburban homeless kids with dreadlocks that have dogs and beg you for your hard earned money on the street (that was a rant in itself), but people that PISS ON THE TOILET SEAT in public restrooms. And by people I mean women. And by women I mean dumb b******. Why? Why do you have to pee all over everything? Why are you hovering and making a mess? Is there blood on the seat? Are you taking a piss in a crime scene? Was someone murdered but you just have to piss all over their chalked-outlined head? What is wrong with you!? The reason most people squat is because there is piss on the toilet seat. How do you think it got there? Because some dumb c*** hovered over a perfectly fine toilet seat in some bar, because she does not want to get herpes or something stupid like that. So before you know it, everyone is peeing everywhere except IN the toilet; on the toilet, around the toilet, on the walls, on their shoes, etc. It is a chain reaction, and it started with you. Now the bathroom is flooded with piss. Thanks. You will not sit on a toilet seat in a public restroom, but you will most likely let someone you met at the bar (that I happen to be at, confronted with all this squatter piss everywhere when I’m trying to piss myself) go home with you and engage in activities that may ACTUALLY give you herpes. And I bet you touched the doorknob on the way out. Look. Now you have AIDS too.


Written by nicolacita

January 4, 2011 at 12:58 pm

Posted in Common Courtesy

3 Responses

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  1. FOR REAL. To get herpes from a toilet, someone would have to have a herpes lesion on their leg where it hits the seat. I mean, I guess my side ass cheek touches the seat a little, but that is not exactly a part of my body that someone rubs their herpes ridden penis or vagina on. So not only would I need to have someone rub on it, the skin would need to be broken to provide entry to the virus. If you are putting your mucus membraines on the toilet seat, you are doing it wrong, and you probably deserve herpes.


    January 4, 2011 at 4:49 pm

  2. This post (and Liz’ response) just grossed me out.


    January 5, 2011 at 1:52 pm

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