Hater Rant

Tell me how you really feel.

Congratulations on your wedding, but maybe you should reconsider having your gift registry at walmart.com.

with 6 comments

I’ve never planned my wedding. I’ve never fantasized about a fabulous wedding gown, the location of my dream wedding, or who the groom will be.

However, I’ve been making imaginary registries since I’ve been 12.

I’ve dreamt of copper pots hanging from an antique pot rack, what color kitchen aid mixer i’d get for the kitchen (red or orange?, 5 or 6 qt?), and what type of clear lucite furniture to choose.

So when I see people registering at wal-mart or bed bath and beyond I cringe.

Yes, I’m sure wal-mart has great deals.

Yes, I know there are ubershiny cookware sets available at wal-mart that look like the ones available at bloomingdales.

But you’re an adult now. You scrounged up money to buy a ring. You went through the painstaking chore of labeling people as “friends” vs.  “acquaintances” to decide just who gets to receive an invite. You spent hours and thousands deciding on a cake, that everyone will be too drunk to remember.

So the question becomes, if you’re not going to use this ceremony as an opportunity to finally get some taste, when will you?

Not that shopping at wal-mart indicates bad taste, but it represents something worse: no taste. it’s the equivalent to a living room furnished solely by ikea, art from bed bath & beyond, or a closet full of Gap jeans and miscellaneous button down shirts.

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Written by tracyhater

December 30, 2010 at 12:11 pm

Posted in Poor Taste

Tagged with ,

6 Responses

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  1. Don’t forget Target. It is your big day. Get it together, people. If your guests can only afford Target, I hardly think you are inviting them for the gift.

    Elizabeth

    December 30, 2010 at 12:54 pm

  2. Oh, and Tracy? 6 quart bowl-lift style. You are worth it.

    Elizabeth

    December 30, 2010 at 12:56 pm

  3. Target does have good stuff, I’ll agree to that. Particularly their Liberty of London line this summer was amazing. The John Derian melamine plates and trays right now are pretty too.

    tracyhater

    December 30, 2010 at 1:01 pm

    • No no no, sweetie. No Target. Not for the wedding, not for anything. I can go to ten stores to get ten things, I am principled like that. I do admit to having a few Liberty of London things, but unless your bridal registry contains items like baby wipes, treat yourself to some Crate and Barrel at least.

      Elizabeth

      December 30, 2010 at 1:18 pm

  4. I feel like target is the best of the worst though. They have the best design for cheap, so i think it’s ok to put on your registry dishware and linens. Don’t return stuff for socks though. If you’re gonna return shit for socks, at least get a registry at bloomingdales and get silk socks.

    tracyhater

    December 30, 2010 at 1:27 pm

  5. what’s wrong with art from bed bath and beyond?

    sunbear

    January 18, 2011 at 6:16 pm


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